Far Away & Once Upon a Day

Once upon a day,
I was your mother.

Far away,
In a foreign land,
We adopted you, took you in,
Made you part of our family.

When your own mother,
Had left you, abandoned you,
To a precarious uncertain future,
I took you in.

I mothered you,
I loved you,
I supported you,
I encouraged you.

Once upon a day,
You visited,
You called,
You cared and were there…but that was before Alzheimer’s set in.

Today I forget,
Even who I am,
Thinking clearly,
A thing of the past.

I might not recognize you,
But I’ll know you,
These days I might not be able to do anything for you,
But I need you.

So far away,
Birthday, Mothers Day, even everyday,
Not a card, not a call, nor a visit,
You tell yourself it’s too hard to see me this way.

Where are you?
How long has it been?
What do you tell yourself, to ease your conscience?
Now that you’ve abandoned me!

Once upon a day,
You loved me too.

Susan Bunts
September 3, 2007

Each Sunday after church I go over to see my mom Gayle who is in an assisted living place for Alzheimer’s patients. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s five years ago. With the foresight of hindsight it was easy to see that she had this for sometime…it just wasn’t bad enough to interfere with her daily functioning to the point of having to take control of her care.

It seems so long ago now. These days I’m most curious as to know what’s going on in that mind of hers. As her disease has progressed she has her ability to have a conversation that makes sense has diminished. She has days where she is more with it than others…but it varies…and her ability to function continues to decline.

Recently the nurses told me that Gayle likes to write. To keep her occupied…they’ll give her a sheet of paper and pen and let her write to her heart’s content. Normally Gayle won’t let them see what she’s written. Instead she hides the paper and goes to her room, tears up the paper and throws it away. I asked if they would try to get some of those letters she writes…and they have been able to snag some of them for me. Her handwriting is at times difficult to read and her thoughts are like her conversation…some what gibberish and not always based on reality. On occasion…there will be something profound or gripping.

The above picture is from a letter I got from the nurses yesterday. Most of the letter rambles on about who knows what…but the last couple of paragraphs she kept writing “Write to me and I’ll write you back. Write to me. Write to me.”

While the person who once was my mother has all but disappeared…the above letter is all too telling.

I am most grateful that she has found favor with the nurses. She is usually rather chipper and funny. I also learned recently that Gayle likes to play Gin Rummy…and at night she plays cards with the nurses and frequently wins.

Now you have a little picture of why Gayle was kicked out of a Baptist College in her youth. Between the dancing, smoking and card playing…not to mention the boys…she wasn’t quite ready for a prim and proper existence at a Baptist College back in the 1930’s.

There are days…when Gayle is being difficult that I fully understand why my grandmother noted that Gayle got a number of spankings as a child. She still likes to push the envelope. Contrasted with her sister Joyce…Gayle was a bit of a rebel.

The above poem may express some of what Gayle feels and why at times I feel frustrated and perplexed.

So many folks don’t feel comfortable in nursing homes or assisted living places. To some extend when you enter these places you feel the pall of once vibrant healthy people…now waiting to die. Most folks that check in will die there. Honestly…I can’t say I feel comfortable there. But it’s like anything…the more you do it…the more familiar it gets.

It’s certainly not what Gayle signed up for…she is now living out her nightmare. It’s certainly not what I signed up for. But isn’t that kind of what life is like? I think we are most fortunate when we get the good stuff in addition to the stinky. Hopefully at the end of the day…the good will outweigh the bad. When the bad is overwhelming…that's when I’m aware that God is carrying me through.

Called

We look to You oh Lord,
For You have a plan,
From before the foundations of our world were laid.

You alone know whom You have called,
A man who loves Your word,
Faithful to preach the truth…uncompromised.

We pray for ears to hear You,
Hearts to obey You,
Willing to follow Your lead.

We ask that You prepare our hearts,
To receive him,
Welcome the one whom you have called…into our fold.

By Susan Bunts
August 26, 2007

As the Pastoral Search Committee gave their report…I found my attention riveted. As Dean got up to speak…lets just say he had my attention. Every few months for close to two years now we’d have a report or update on the status and progress our Pastoral Search Committee. It’s been almost two years since our beloved Pastor Chuck Obremski finished well…and went home to be with our Lord.

During that time…God has prepared our hearts. He gave us time to grieve and mourn. A time to accept. A time to look to the Lord and seek His plan and timing. A time to hunger and thirst for His Word. Now it appears that time may have come to a close. While it remains in the hands of the Lord and we continue to ask for His wisdom and guidance, as we may soon have a Senior Pastor.

With state of many churches today…we are most concerned that this man whom God has called be deeply rooted and grounded in the Word of God. That he will be faithful to preach the Word…since it has the power of salvation…for all who believe.

When we look out on our church body…we don’t know who still needs to hear the Gospel message. Yet we all need the Word of God…which is able to divide soul and spirit…to comfort and convict. May we be mindful that there are ravenous wolves which seek to devour the sheep. We pray that God will bring us a shepherd who will tend to us and care for us…like the Good Shepherd.

So we wait…continue to pray for God timing, God’s plan…and the man whom God has called. Will you pray with us?

I Desire Rain

Oh Lord,
I feel so very small indeed.

Only silence,
Fills my days.

You dear Lord,
Seem so very far from me.

Like the dry parched land,
I desire rain.

I search, I seek,
Incline my listening ear towards Thee.

Only You know,
That which my lips I dare not utter.

My heart broken,
Requires Thy healing hand.

Like the waterless thirsty riverbed,
I desire rain.

I turn the pages,
I ask…seek Thy Spirit’s lead.

Like the wind ‘neath the eagles wing,
I pray Thy Spirit will carry me.

A miracle is needed,
Nothing short thereof.

I search the sky, no cloud in sight,
I desire rain.

By Susan Bunts
August 18, 2007

A Simple Praise

What day will I see my last sunrise?
On what day will I behold my last sunset forevermore?
Will I have taken the time to thank Him?
To praise Him for what He’s given me?

A hope everlasting,
My eternal future secured,
All bought and paid for by His freewill offering,
The precious blood of the Lamb.

On the day after my last,
I will see an earth rise from my heavenly home,
Praise unending will flow from my lips,
Most thankful for the Son rise in which I will share…forevermore.

By Susan Bunts
August 13, 2007

Deceived

Even the elect may be deceived,
By a work packaged with purpose.

Influenced by their emotions,
Their words of praise are influenced and driven.

Even as they themselves firmly preach the Word of God,
Acknowledge today’s church, like the infant only desires milk.

Well hidden by the attractive wrappings,
They fail to see that the meat of the Word is not preached.

Souls lost in their sin sitting on Sunday morn,
Will not hear the Gospel message for fear that it might offend.

Observation will reveal,
Attendees do not carry, nor raise the sword of the Spirit.

Satan delights as they grow and prosper,
Earn widespread praise from the mouths of men.

An ineffective foe they are,
For the battle they fail to be equipped.

Deceived as they sit in their pews,
Ears tickled and they feel so good.

The Word of God delectably mixed,
With error and the wisdom of men.

Does the preacher feel no conviction?
Is not the son disciplined by the Father?

Tragically some will one day hear,
The Savior’s final words, “Away from me, I never knew you!”

By Susan Bunts
August 4, 2007

The above poem was inspired when I heard a beloved Bible study teacher singing the praises of a ministry that regularly preaches a watered down Gospel message due to the offensive nature of the cross and sin to the unbeliever.

Sinners will not hear the Gospel message out in the world for the world does not know the message of salvation. The place unbelievers must hear Gospel is in the church. If we fail to preach and teach the full counsel of the Word of God for fear that we will offend…are we not consigning the sinner to hell? All done with the good intention of not wanting to hurt of offend or hurt someone. Is not an eternity in hell infinitely worse than any hurt or offense felt when confronted by the truth of the Word of God?

“In hell, where he was in torment, he looked up and saw Abraham far away, with Lazarus by his side. So he called to him, 'Father Abraham, have pity on me and send Lazarus to dip the tip of his finger in water and cool my tongue, because I am in agony in this fire.' "But Abraham replied, 'Son, remember that in your lifetime you received your good things, while Lazarus received bad things, but now he is comforted here and you are in agony.” – Luke 16:23-25

The Hand of God

It’s a miracle, declares man,
Amazing…that more did not perish.

But from the throne room of heaven,
Our God dispatches a host of angels to carry out His plan.

Just seconds earlier or a few feet further,
The loss would have been unimaginable…incomprehensible.

In the unseen world, legions of angels are dispatched,
Their hour of work is now at hand.

An unseen hand is outstretched,
Braces a vehicle or nudges it just a bit further.

It teeters on a precipice,
Yet it will not plummet into the mighty Mississippi tonight.

He raises up men,
Draws forth courage in those we will soon call heroes.

Untold scores will walk away,
Utter why me and consider God’s purpose and plan.

For those souls called home,
To their appointed time…we pray.

Until we enter heaven’s gates,
The full extent of his mercies will remain unknown.

In God’s hand may we rest securely, ever mindful,
Our divine appointment approaches closer with each passing day.

By Susan Bunts
August 2, 2007

For images of this compelling human tragedy...please see the photo essay at the Minneapolis Star Tribune or Fox News.

Where is Thy Sweet Savor?

Oh Christian…where is thy sweet savor,
Of a life…holy, consecrated, acceptable unto Me?

I have called you from darkness to light,
To live a life, holy devoted unto Me.

Set apart for good works,
That I ordained for you before the foundations of the world.

You have been called to be My ambassador,
Yet I see you entwined in the cares of this world.

Sin entangles you,
Rendering you no longer effective to a world lost in sin.

The sinner examines your life and concludes,
No different than I, so I must be a Christian too.

Thy words, thy deeds,
Do they reflect Me?

Satan will clamor and shout with glee,
He’ll utter hypocrite, liar and sinner too!

Do you hunger for the meat of My word,
Is it hidden within your heart?

Will you choose to be conformed by this world,
Or receive My promise…be ye transformed and renewed in Me?

Does your heart break…even ache,
For that which breaks My heart?

Will you run the race,
Strive towards the upward calling?

Finish strong…
I beckon you "Come…live a life of no regrets!"

By Susan Bunts
July 27, 2007

This poem is dedicated to my precious Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who called me from darkness to light and death unto life; and to my beloved former Pastor Chuck Obremski…who uncompromisingly taught us the Word of God so that our hearts and minds would be transformed and renewed in Christ Jesus.

Dear Dissension

Dear Dissension,

It is with great eagerness that I commend you,
For your effective division,
Of the body of Christ.

As you know,
It is my deepest desire to see,
Those once on fire for Christ no longer a threat to my kingdom of darkness.

Good work…job well done
Your methods ever so clever,
Stealth…undetected…quite easily they follow your lead.

An effective mix,
Of genuine issues blended with personal opinion,
Lead them down the primrose path and soon we’ll see a critical spirit in full bloom.

Tread lightly,
Careful you must be…so as not to alert them,
Of our true mission to bring dishonor to their King.

May they not see their transgression,
Nor be repentant…and seek forgiveness of their sin,
Press onward…what’s a little gossip and slander…when carefully hidden as constructive criticism.

Dissension…be sure to blind them,
Veil their eyes, so they may not see,
May they not grow stronger by the reading God’s Word.

May they forget about prayer,
Or battling this war upon on their knees,
Calling upon their God will only bring our much hated foe…to battle by their side.

Throw out the bait,
Hook them with dissatisfaction,
Reel them in with discontent.

Divide them, conquer them,
Big or small, young or old…it matters not,
Use music, or style or even their precious translations to divide.

May they not be like their God,
Who looks upon the heart,
Instead may they only dwell upon that which their flesh can see and hear.

Divide them,
Scatter them,
Send them to the four winds.

My deepest desire,
To see that beacon…that bright and shining light upon the hill,
Extinguished…so I can take countless more souls to hell!

Insincerely yours…the enemy of their souls!

By Susan Bunts - July 17, 2007

Hand It Over

Hand it over…Preacher boy,
Step away from the Gospel.

That’s good…now make them believe,
It’s their character,
Their righteousness that saves them,
Not the righteousness of Christ.

Never let them know the truth,
That there is no one righteous, no not one,
That their salvation was bought and paid for,
Through the blood of Jesus when He died on the cross.

Make them believe,
The wisdom of men,
Which speaks of works righteousness,
Not the holy, perfect, acceptable sacrifice of Christ Jesus alone.

Let them hear stories,
Instead be inspired by heroes and stories of men,
Hush…they needn’t know the truth,
That the Word of God alone can heal their broken lives.

Perhaps there is one not yet saved,
Who does not yet know the power of the Holy Spirit,
Of One who convicts men of sin,
Or the One who can transform their lives…by His power within.

Let them rest comfortably,
Seeking integrity in the eyes of men,
Share not the Gospel message, no nary a word,
Lest they be saved…a new creation in Christ

Good work,
Job well done…
Christ was not mentioned,
Not a whisper of promised assurance…forgiveness of their sin.

Preacher man…do not loose heart,
Nor feel you’ve betrayed,
The Gospel of Christ,
To a world not yet saved.

Insincerely yours,
The enemy!

By Susan Bunts
July 1, 2007

Walk the Talk

There once was a time,
When I trusted you,
Took you at your word.

But that was before,
Circumstances and trials revealed,
That this time you didn’t walk the talk.

Respect was once earned,
Your character seemed proven and true,
Then a whirlwind disrupted my faith.

Did I expect too much?
Did I measure this man…
Against an impossible standard?

How do I move beyond doubt?
Once again trust,
One not perfect, but oh so very good?

How do I work my way back?
How do I restore my trust,
In a man that is very human…flawed?

Forgiveness is the order of the day,
My first step,
Walking in the path of Christ’s love.

by Susan Bunts 4/28/07

In Your Eyes

Invisible,
Insignificant,
Irrelevant,
Just doesn’t matter.

Unworthy,
Undeserving,
Unimportant,
Not worth the bother.

Trash,
Refuse,
Garbage,
Only to be discarded.

To Forgive or Not to Forgive

To forgive or not to forgive, that is the question.
Whether it is easier to dwell upon an offense,
And grow hurt into anger and bitterness.

Or forgive the offender,
Whether repentant of their deed,
Or cold hearted and unresponsive.

To focus on the pain,
Feed a gloomy countenance,
That looms like a thundercloud overhead.

Or obey my heavenly Father’s command,
To forgive my fellow man,
That I too might be forgiven.

To believe the lies of the enemy,
Be controlled by that, which is temporary,
Fail to recognize that this too shall pass.

Or trust Jesus Christ my Savior,
Think upon that which is true, lovely and pure.
Seek that which is praiseworthy and of eternal value.

by Susan Bunts – December 18, 2006

This year has been not only a year of clarity…but one with many lessons in forgiveness.

I’m a pretty straight shooter in life…and when confronted with something that’s not right…I will likely speak my mind in a very direct manner. Not leave a lot of wiggle room. If I don’t speak my mind…then I hold onto that which bothered me and I can’t even look the person in the eye and I loose respect.

I don’t know quite what to do when I get no response. It’s hard…I’d prefer a response of “Go pound sand!” than to be ignored.

But when I’m met with silence…I have a choice. God calls me to forgive. That forgiveness should not be dependent on someone acknowledging an offense, apologizing or choosing to ignore me. If let my reaction and choice to forgive be dependent upon them…then I’m held hostage.

Instead my Father in heaven…has made it abundantly clear that I need to walk in present, everyday forgiveness. It is only by His strength and wisdom I can do that which goes against my nature…forgive.

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” – Matthew 18:21-22

My Emmanuel…God with me

When uncertainties abound,
He was my steady Rock.

When friends were scarce,
He never left me, nor forsook me.

When my faith failed me,
He remained ever faithful.

When anxiety was my lot,
He invited me to cast my cares upon Him.

When my soul was inconsolable,
He comforted me.

When joy eluded me,
He arranged an appointment with joy.

When the phone did not ring,
He remained a friend…who sticks much closer than a brother.

When the road ahead was dark,
He was the light unto my path.

When understanding was absent,
He provided clarity and insight through His word.

When disappointment swamped my soul,
He was my bright and shinning hope.

When tears were shed in solitude,
His nail pierced hands wiped my eyes.

When fear gripped my heart,
He was my courage to forge ahead.

When my prayers failed me,
He interceded for me at the right hand of the Father.

When this little lamb strayed into the thicket of doubt and unbelief,
The Good Shepherd rescued me from the ravenous wolf.

When ready to live a settled for life,
He challenged me to come up higher.

When I stood firm and waited,
I saw the deliverance of my Lord…Emmanuel.

by Susan Bunts - 12/7/06

Many folks compose a letter each year to be enclosed with their Christmas cards. I wouldn’t even know where to begin with this tumultuous, roller coaster of a year. Even if I attempted to put pen to paper…goodness only knows the words…would soon be a novel, not a mere letter.

That being said…when all else failed me…Jesus Christ my Emmanuel remained with me each day, each step of the way. May this poem be my praise and thanksgiving to my faithful, loving Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I also want to say thank you to those of you who prayed for me during this difficult and challenging year. Lord bless!

My Heart’s Desire

A certain wildness,
That can not be tamed.

Maddeningly aloof,
Yet I find myself drawn.

He hears me,
Like none before.

A quite confidence,
Seeks not the praise of men.

At times immovable,
Yet a plea for help will be answered.

Humble strength,
Helps those in need.

Vulnerability,
Deep beneath the surface.

Scars remain,
Hurt deep within the soul.

Faithfulness and truth,
Ever so rare in this generation.

My heart yearns,
Desires one…such as this.

Once Considered a Friend

There once was a man called friend.
With sparkling blue eyes and an engaging smile,
Who captured my heart.

A thoughtful, kind and caring soul.
Through thick and through thin,
A good friend to all.

Passionate and caring of things of import.
Arguments vocalized with a friendly banter,
Refusal to back down or be swayed from his point.

Then the day came, when rough waters abound.
A cry went out for the help of a supportive friend.
Only to be met with silence.

Confused information with participation.
Choices sent waves of disappointment;
From which he would not repent.

The phone remained silent; e-mails unanswered.
Hurt and withdrawal necessitated,
A decision…to give up.

Decision made to move on.
Eyes fixed forward, must not look back.
In reality…a struggle each day.

Until one day…success.
Conversation…but nary a thought of him came to mind.
Shocked, surprised and appalled!

How could I…what kind of a person am I?
To so easily forget,
One, once considered a friend?

What I Wouldn’t Give

Dear Chuck,
trials and tribulations abound.

Keenly aware,
how much I miss you.

My desire,
to pick up the phone.

Hear godly council,
from one whom I respect.

To once again,
sit under your teaching.

Knowing God,
will use His willing servant.

Speaking God’s word,
to correct, rebuke or encourage.

No doubt,
an occasional flinch would be seen.

As God’s word,
takes steady aim, piercing my heart.

A tear,
or two would be wiped away.

As I see,
my wobbly faith has fallen short.

Yet my God,
provided rich teaching from his humble servant.

Daily I feast,
to strengthen my heart, mind and soul.

Encouraged to know,
his humble servant finished well.

I know firsthand,
I witnessed the power of God’s word.

My prayer,
that I too will hear.

Jesus words,
“Well done, my faithful servant.”

P.S.,
I miss you my beloved Pastor.

Thanking God for my beloved former Pastor, Chuck Obremski and the dedicated servants at Kindred Community Church who carry on the mission of Reaching the World with the Word of God.

If you too are going through difficult times or times of temptation and trial, please click on the link to Kindred Community Church and listen to the online sermons or e-mail the audio ministry and request some of the teaching albums. Trust me…your faith will be strengthened and challenged. You will grow and your walk will be made steady as you feast on God’s word.

Lasting Impressions

Frustrated;
Hurt and angry too.

Caught between;
Inept and unwilling.

Faith and doubt;
Wavering in between.

Incapable or unwilling;
Beyond my understanding.

Disappointed;
Surely not what I imagined.

Courage;
Lacking these days.

Expectations;
Dashed against reality.

Messages;
No reply…still waiting.

Not even worth it;
A waste of time to ask why.

Forget about it;
Out with the old.

Respect for whom?
Where did it go?

Welcome to hell…step right in!

I awoke to the news today,
That evil personified had met his maker.

Today Al Zarqawi,
Was welcomed to the gates of hell.

Al, please meet your torturers,
They will be with you for eternity.

Yes…the temperature it a little hot,
Fear not…it will get worse.

Oh, those screams you hear,
Your voice will soon be added to them.

Take a good look around,
This is the last you will ever see of another soul.

Al Zarqawi,
Is that you trembling?

Tell me,
Do you think Nick Berg trembled at your hand?

Starting to sink in now?
A little too late to realize you’ve got it all wrong.

Don’t be getting weak kneed on me now,
After all, this will just last…for eternity.

Fret not…there is still plenty of room,
For all your friends.

See that spot…specially prepared for Osama,
He’ll be joining us soon.

Mr. Al Zarqawi,
It will be my pleasure to serve you justice for eternity.

What’s the matter…don’t you want to enter in?
Boys, “Grab him”.

Make no mistake,
You will enter in, it’s not optional.

Words Left Unspoken…

Desperation I fear is my lot,
Tempted to utter words,
Best left unspoken.

You failed me…
Where were you…
Why didn’t you fight for me?

My heart and mind,
Disconnected…
I don’t understand!

Trust evades me,
Trying,
Truly I am.

My faith,
My hope,
Where are you now?

Broad shoulders,
Carry a load,
I fear I’m only adding to.

My mind knows the truth,
My eyes have seen daily,
My ears have heard your words.

How do I bridge the gap?
Bring heart and mind in sync?
My desire…trust, hope and faith.


Have you ever doubted someone…whose only aim is do the right thing and help you? And you know your doubts and wobbly faith…adds to their burdens and an already heavy load? Sometimes…I don’t know the answer…or how to make that leap of faith. But I attempt to disarm its hold over me…by speaking the truth. Right now…somehow I need to make the connection between my heart and my mind. My lack of trust…is a reflection solely on me.

I’m sorry!

The Weight of His World

When you look in his eyes these days,
You’ll see someone carrying the burdens of many.

Desperate phone calls from those whose future is uncertain,
Pleas to know what will happen as they face the unknown.

A reputation for always doing the right thing,
He aims to treat everyone with respect.

Only now the answers are not forthcoming,
This time, the decisions are not his to make.

For now, sleepless nights are his lot,
Dark circles bear witness, as does the pain in his eyes.

Most desperate to take care of his people,
None will ever fully know his efforts on their behalf.

He cries out to God for wisdom and strength,
As he carries the weight of his world on his shoulders.


For you...I thank you for everything you've done. I am most grateful and humbled...even though it doesn't always come through in what I say and do.

A Hope…a Chance…United 93

A hope…but not a guarantee,
A chance…but not a certainty,
Had the passengers on United 93.

A picture…
A realization…
Of the evil set before them.

Subdued initially by lies,
Communication with loved ones,
Their true mission revealed.

Awful truth sets in,
Oppressed, overwhelmed, just want to cry,
After all…what can we do?

A flicker of hope,
A strength surges through,
Hearts and minds steeled for the mission ahead.

Not a choice,
But a must,
We dare not allow them success.

A plan is formed,
Last goodbyes are said,
Ours the first step, in the war on terror.

Will they ever know the truth?
Will they know that we tried?
Will they remember…and never forget?

They must be strengthened,
And never loose sight,
Find courage, fight strong, finish the battle.

A hope…but not a guarantee,
A chance…but not a certainty,
Let’s roll…let’s fight, our battles’ begun.

Dedicated to the Passengers & Crew of United 93
Susan Bunts
5/2/06