Friday, February 27, 2009
Beautiful
Beautiful is the woman who loves the Lord
She grows sweeter
With each passing year
In the midst of difficulties
Trying circumstances
She leans on, depends upon the Lord
She has a peace that passes all understanding
When others around her are anxious
She has a quiet trust that the Lord will work it out
Her countenance radiates
Joy and happiness, peace and love
As she grows more like her Savior
Her voice is sweet
She chooses to bless and not curse
Praise God and pray
She befriends all whom she encounters
Confident that the Lord has brought them into her path
Humbly she offers encouragement and wise, godly counsel
She raised her children
In the fear and admonition of the Lord
Trusting God’s faithful promises to those who love the Lord
She does not grow old
No matter what the calendar might say
Instead she’s growing into the woman God designed her to be
She has an inner grace and radiance
A light that shines forth
As she basks in the glory of the Lord
She looks forward
To the day the Lord will bring her home
There she will be reunited with those who have gone before
She does not fear for her future is secure
Her hope can never be shaken
For her foundation is built on Christ alone
By Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 26, 2009
One of my favorite things is to turn on the digital picture and watch the pictures randomly scroll through the hundreds and thousands of pictures that are loaded on that little tiny memory card. Yesterday as glanced over at the picture frame…Jean’s picture came up…and in my mind I could hear her sweet voice from singing the night before at Bible study. Soon the pictures of many other women whom I am so blessed by God to know came up. I found the contrast striking to the last poem I wrote about...“Mean Girls”. What a difference these godly women who continue to grow in the Lord. With each passing year, they grow more beautiful…and radiate the love of Christ.
This poem is dedicated to these beautiful women of God that I know. I thank you for the example you share…and pray that one day…I will grow into the woman God created me to be. Love you so much and thank God for you!
Monday, February 23, 2009
My Darkest Hour
In my darkest hour
You are my bright and Morning Star
When my head hangs low
You are the lifter of my head
When tears fall I remember
One day you will wipe every tear from my eyes
Even when I feel alone
You are my Friend who will never leave, nor forsake me
When life leaves me burnt, devastated and scarred
You bring forth life, growth and renewal
From the depths of sin
You redeemed my soul
From the edge of destruction
You snatched me from the enemy’s hand
When I feel as if I can’t go on
You lead me through dark ravines and narrow canyons
When my foot slips on the dangerous precipice
You uphold and steady me on the path again
When weakness overtakes me
You strengthen and sustain me
When doubts assail me
You keep my mind stayed on Thee
When my circumstances demand an explanation
Your presence is all that I need
When nothing around me makes sense
I trust that Your eternal plan being worked out
When I am heavy laden
I go to the One who bids me to come for His burdens are light
When decisions demand an answer
I come to You for wisdom
When I am restless with uncertainty
Peace and comfort are found in You
When pain consumes me
I turn to the Great Physician
When the wait seems long
I will wait upon the Lord
When no one seems worthy of my trust
I will trust in the One whom the Father declared worthy
When my trials seem big
I will run to Him who is bigger still
When this lamb is lost and has wandered far away
I cry out to the Shepherd who will seek and find me
When death presses down on me
I look forward with eternal vision
Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 23, 2009
Dedicated to the many people who are bearing heavy burdens, where explanations are few. May you continue to trust in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ…and cling to Him ever so tightly.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Unforgiveness Heavy Price
It’s hardened towards thee
Over a hurt perceived
What if the offense was intentional
What if you don’t care
What if the words “I’m sorry” never come
I know I should open my heart
Find the words to say
Restore fellowship with you once again
Yet my heart is reluctant
Unwilling to risk vulnerability
By giving voice to the pain
My heart has grown cold
It’s visible on my countenance
Effecting my thoughts and deeds
Oh Lord, I know this is wrong
Tender my heart
To Thy perfect will
My conscious is pricked by the words I read
Unforgiveness exacts a price
Heavier than I’m willing to pay
I want harmony and unity
With my fellow Christian
Fellowship restored with God and man
Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 16, 2009
The Path Not Chosen
She did not choose
Yet it will willed by God
Eventually all
Would be taken from her
Blessings were found
In the midst of Alzheimer’s
To openly express love
She unashamedly offers hugs and affection
April 2009
While unpacking the remaining boxes from our move I discovered a writing tablet that I used to carry with me on my visits to see my mom. I discovered this poem that I had written just before her death. The exact date is unknown…but it was in late April 2008 shortly before her death.
My mother Gayle Lorenat feared Alzheimer’s because her sister had died from it. She saw its effects and the devastation first hand. I hated it because it took a smart, bright, proper woman…and robbed her of dignity. Yet at the end of her life…after six years of Alzheimer’s I had to admit…there were a few blessings from God in the midst. One of those blessings was that my mother who had never been one to be affectionate or say I love you was finally able to freely express love.
The picture above was taken of my mother, Gayle Lorenat shortly after we moved her into Brighton Gardens. She was more with it at that time and tried to give the appearance of normal. She had to wear a bracelet that would set off an alarm because she liked to “escape”. I called it her “LoJack” bracelet. She would walk away and have no idea how to get back. She was unable to communicate coherently.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Broken, Hurting Soul
Here I am
A sitting duck
Vulnerable
For that which so easily entangles me
I have sinned
Against God
And against man
Justifiably reproached by those who love me
I long to flee from sin
Say, “No!”
Turn my this ship around
But how
I haven’t the strength on my own
Where do I begin
How do I start
To turn my life around
I’ve tried…really I have
It seems like every door is closed
Slammed shut in my face
What am I supposed to do now
I don’t even know if I believe in God
But I do believe in the devil
For he has deceived me
I believed his lies…hook, line and sinker
Drugs and alcohol
They were supposed to numb the pain
Help me feel good about who I am
Make me forget about everything I’m not
But before I knew it…sin took hold of me
What kind of son betrays his own mother
The one who loved me
Always freely gave
I went from the occasional
“Little white lie”
Before long
My heart grew cold and calloused
Now I’m
Trapped by my iniquity
With ease I’ve hurt and used
Anyone in my path
Society tells me
I’ve served my time
Paid the price
For the wrong I’ve done
Now I’ve been set free
I want to change…I really do
People tell me they are praying
Not sure what that means…but please don’t stop
Yes…I desperately need God’s help
But I also need
A helping hand
From real live flesh and blood
Someone who understands
Knows what I’m feeling
Encountered those demons within
That I’m fighting with all my might
Someone to hold me accountable
Show me how to get along
What to do…what not to do
How to live in the day to day world
Someone who understands
What seems like baby steps
Is a giant leap
For this broken, hurting soul
Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 10, 2009
When I read the first lines of this poem to my husband Chris he thought, “Oh no…what has Susan done that she needs to confess?” But I assured him it wasn’t my story I was writing about…but instead a compilation of some of those broken, hurting souls we know. It is by the grace of God…I’ve been spared the wayward path of some.
But we all know some of these people…family or friends whose lives have spiraled out of control. Or maybe…just maybe…it’s me that God has delivered from my wayward past. May God help these broken, hurting souls.
Thank you to those who have a heart to help. Those who offer a helping hand, prayer, wise counsel from God's word…and tough love. This poem is dedicated to Gary Peterson who heads the Prison Ministry at Kindred Community Church.
Missing
I tell people that you are missing
The truth of the matter is
I have no idea what’s become of you
Until “that day”
I had always thought highly of you
Believed that you were upstanding and hardworking
Then the truth of your character
Was revealed
The depths of your depravity became clear
After that
I didn’t want to have much to do with you
The occasionally obligatory phone call sufficed
Because of our mom
We had to have some contact
But then you faded away
Has it been five or six years now
I forget
Time and events all seem to run together
Honestly I found myself angry
Resentful
That you had nothing to do with our mother
No cards
No phone calls
No checking in to see how she was doing
Was it guilt that drove you away
Or because the well had dried up
It was no longer profitable for you
Well, your mom has been dead
For almost a year now
I have no way to let you know
Or are you still out there
Anonymously
But somehow still in the know
It’s hard to imagine
That the one who resorted to dishonesty
Would not seek his fair share of what remained
That’s why I fear
Wonder daily
What’s happened to you
Did you cross the wrong person this time
Reap the consequences
Of the depths to which you’ve sunk
Is your body lying in a shallow grave
Hidden…never be discovered
Will your fate ever be known
Are your remains in a morgue
The name John Doe
Tied to your toe
Are you imprisoned
Has the law finally caught up with you
Are you paying society its due
Or are you far away
In some distant land
Hoping to avoid the penalty for your wrong doing
There is not a day
That I don’t think about you
Worry and wonder what’s become of you
I don’t know where to begin
Or what to do
To find you
The search I paid for
Came up fruitless
All traces of you disappeared a few years ago
Only God knows what’s become of you
Dear brother, I pray that the Reveler of mysteries
Will reveal what’s happened to you
Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 11, 2009
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
Sin's Perfect Sacrifice
In Your word
I learned of the sacrificial system
Instituted by Holy God
Who cannot look upon sin
When sin entered the world
Our sinless nature was changed
Try as I might…no amount of good works
Can save me from my sin
In my sin nature
I miss the mark
Transgress when I intentionally violate Your law
I descend into iniquity when I called evil good
Sacrifices seem so bloody…so brutal
Repulsed at the thought
Of an innocent dying
For the sins of another
The high priest of old
Laid his hands upon the sin offering
Confessed the sins of the nation
The sacrificial animal was killed…its blood sprinkled
What seems so brutal
Was the provision of a holy, loving God
To cover sin
Restore relationship with sinful man
Thankful to be living
When the sacrifice which cleansed me outwardly
Has been replaced by Christ’s perfect sacrifice
He died once, for all…and took my sin away
Perhaps I can imagine
Laying my hands upon Jesus’ head
Confessing my transgressions and iniquity
See my Savior afflicted and nailed to the cross
Would sin lose its grip on me
Would I recognize the high cost of my redemption
Would I realize that the only contribution I made to my salvation
Was the sin which Christ chose to bear
A plan so amazing
Conceived before the foundations of the world
My name was written with everlasting ink
In the Lamb’s Book of Life
By Susan Bunts Wachtel
February 4, 2009
Dedicated to Terri…thank you for so faithfully preaching the full counsel of God’s word!